This weekend in a fit of nostalgia I bought a box of Otter - okay, is it Otter Pops? Or Otterpops?

[One trip to the freezer later...]

Okay, looks like the correct spelling is Otter*Pops - the asterisk appears to be mandatory. Also, Louie-Bloo Raspberry assures me they are "Original", and while the package is convincingly retro and has all the bright goofiness I remember, I sincerely hope the contents are more contemporary.

My favorite thing about Otter*Pops (other than the names of the flavors, which reel madly between pun and non sequitor), is imagining the moment they were invented:

HEAD OF MARKETING: Gentleman, the market is wide open for a delicious fast freeze ice bar. R&D has already engineered seven zippy flavors, six of which are safe for human consumption. Now it's up to us - what do we call them?

MARKETING GUY: How about "Freez-R-Pops"?

ANOTHER MARKETING GUY: Could Toys-R-Us sue us?

MG: Not if we keep the R facing the right way in the logo.

HOM: It's too obvious, and besides, we need a merchandizing tie-in. We need cute characters -

AMG: "Supreme Court Pops"!

MG: "Sunkist Rehnquist"!

HOM: No, no - I said cute. Like animals...

AMG: "Boa Pops"!

MG: "Squid Pops, featuring Fast-Freeze Tentacles"!

HOM: No, we need warm and fuzzy animals.

AMG: "Badger Pops"!

HOM: Yes, something along those lines...

MG: "Weasel Pops"?

HOM: Close...only more comical and less likely to chew your face off if given half a chance.

AMG: "Otter Pops"?

HOM: Say, that's not bad. But it's still missing something...

MG: What if put an asterisk between "Otter" and "Pop"?

HOM: That's it!

I totally would have bought Supreme Court Pops.